It Wasn't Him
by Shadzninja
Summary: Raphael hadn't done this since age 14, stand up comedy for a brother in this way. It wasn't HIS brother though. [1987, post season 10 episode 01]
Raph was sitting down on a crate he had placed outside of the little wooden hut that held within it a beast. A beast that had been created in the name of getting rid of inner demons. A genetic demon. A genetic turn-you-blood-hungry and ugly-as-Michelangelo-in-a-bad-costume genetics. The beast snarled and scratched at the planks that were reinforced for the twentieth time that night but it didn't frighten Raphael when the planks bent and rattled on its hinges.

"So..." Raphael said as he drug out his 'o' in a silly manner.

The beast stopped squirming and scratching profoundly at his cages wooden-metal-steel fused overnight holding cell. The beast looked at him with a bountiful expression. The pure proof their was a being with it - or a new midnight snack - must have made the monster less anxious then when it was alone.

Heh, must be afraid of the darkness.

Or being alone with only itself. That seemed reasonable enough. Look what he was talking about...

"So... your a monster of all types of strengths and faults am I right?" Raphael asks in genuine curiosity, "Mind explaining any of those?"

The beast rocked and teeters on its feet and it seems to understand but know all that it can muster was grunts, cries, bellows, and howls in all different octaves. The spikes resting on it's back were brushing the ceiling when it threw itself upwards with its head braced in an attempt to break something. And not succeeding. All the problems it manage to cause was a scratching sounds of a hardened vertebrae attachment and steel plating scrapping together. Also a cry of soft agony when the beast stopped shuffling shakily.

Raphael made a ticking noise with his mouth and waved a single finger in the cages direction, "Woah bub, rude! I see you all shattered and groveling in your own sorrow in that cage of yours and decide a friend would make you feel better and you respond by flooding my ear holes with blood? That won't cut it buddy..."

The monster only got a single growl out before Raphael stood up to leave but turned to face the cage from his position by the crates, "Hey, hey! I don't have to entertain your sorry ugliness at all, so I can leave any second. I have better things to do tonight then be a standing moron talking to a brick wall. Or die depending if I'm stupid enough to get close. Do you want me to leave?"

The monster didn't respond but the look of desperation and exacerbation flashed into Raphael's sight before the monster growled again. Those dark and heart warming mocha brown irises were in no place to be on a scared and horrified expression like that but Raphael needed to see something.

Other than anger or hunger.

"Ah!" Raphael warned, the beast looking at him in shock as he anticipated his growl, "I want a straight answer here. One grunt for "Get lost Raphael" or no grunt for "Please, stay, I beg of you"."

The beast was about to play dumb, he could see through it. The beast was going to roar since Raph hadn't ruled it out but he obviously saw Raphael was not joking. Raph wanted to know if the monster was actually sentient in this form. To see a sign of life in it.

The beast made a indifferent expression and looked away from Raphael, but did not grunt or snort.

"Ah, so your lonely?" Raphael said, lightening up and winking briefly, "So, you can answer my questions like a good monkey?"

The being was startled, Raphael could see that. But in the way he hoped it would have. It looked at him like Donatello would when he was using his brain to piece together his science babble or something that actually made sense without the gag at the end. Like Michelangelo when he made a pun of all jokes, or made a crude joke in front April or any other friend he had over, or Leonardo when he... would do anything really. But Leonardo didn't look at him with a startled "Why, God" look but a smile filled gaze of acceptance like "I have no will over your jokes and I therefore am enjoying it like it is" and would laugh lightly while Donatello scoffed.

And it was invigorating to see.

"I mean, look at you!" Raphael pushed, "All locked up and ready to be tested! Yes or no tested!"

The beast went back to it's indifferent state, not acknowledging Raphael as he toke a step or so forward and did a gag routine. Raphael could see the beast eyes fill with knowing as he did something he hadn't done in years. Raphael put on a comedians smile and physical stance, one leg in front of the other, and pretend to fix his invisible tie as he rolled his eye ridge at his audience. God, it felt like ages since he'd done this, age 14 he believed. In the family room as the electricity went out and had to become the entertainment that night. And it was worth it.

"So, one grunt for a no, two for a yes, and just do whatever if I dig too personal. Easy enough for ya' is it?" Raphael said as he pulled his invisible mic to him.

Two certain but airy grunts.

"Now, my loyal audience, this is purely for entertainment." And making sure you don't lose any sentience til morning. "Now, sweetheart, do you think this posture is familiar.

Two immediate grunts, the brown eyes going over his person many time like a scanner.

"Good, good." Raphael put on an accent, "Can I call ya' that? Sweetheart?"

A single grunt.

"Dollface?"

Another grunt.

"Sugar?"

Snort of frustration.

"Babe?"

The creature made a louder noise this time, one that would rival a bears low howl of warning in a single note of breath.

"Okay, okay. Touchy, touchy." Raphael said and he makes a shuffle to readjust his footing, "Are you okay here? Are you satisfied with our four star renovation?"

A single grunt. No, huh? Raphael couldn't blame him for it.

"Looks like we have to bump it down into a three." Raphael said happily and he could have sworn he heard a laugh.

A laugh. A throaty and almost inhuman one, but a laugh. The being in front of him was curling it's muscles on its stretched jaw like it couldn't care less about its cage anymore.

The last time he'd seen a smile like that was when Leonardo, Michelangelo, and him had been in the living room at age ten. Donatello had gone on his turn with Splinter to collect food for the next week and supplies to fix the home up a little more. Raphael was sitting next to Leonardo, who unlike Raphael's slouching posture was sitting like an angel with his back in a line and arms over his legs, while Michelangelo was standing on the coffee table restating lines and actions of his comic book. Michelangelo had gotten to issue #4 of a comic series named "Justice Revision" when Leonardo had a sudden need to cough. Leonardo jerked slightly and he held his elbow to his mouth and finished up after a second. Michelangelo had silenced for Leonardo to finish. Raphael had called out "NERD!" not a second later after Leonardo stopped coughing. Leonardo and Michelangelo had burst out laughing, but Leo's smile was tight lipped like the beast as Michelangelo had tackled them in their seats.

Raphael looked at the crease of flesh that was a smile. The monster was smiling. In its only way possible. Now those mocha browns weren't so dreadful to watch.

"Now, time for something serious." Raphael said, "Are you okay with being left alone?"

The beast didn't respond, it looked confused. But not first. First was fear at the word "alone" but quickly found out how vague that question was. "Past tense or future tense?" he must be thinking.

Raphael sighed and looked at the beast with a saddened look. Those smile folds were now gone, the none crease face of confusion like a beacon.

"Do you... do you still fear the dark?"

Two grunts lowly.

"Really? Are you really still scared of the dark...?" Raphael almost coughs from his dry throat laugh, "I'll have to ask about that later..."

Soft grunts.

"Do you, hmm... still have that old 101 Yak 'Em Ups book I gave you a year ago?" Raphael asked the being.

A single chuckled snort. No, he hadn't kept the book he had rented a while back.

"Darn, I though you'd have it under your eye..." Raphael chuckled along with the beast.

The beast was watching him now, the open and curious eyes wandering over him. The game seemed to crush any of the animalistic urges and actions like him tearing himself to pieces as he launched at the door or ceiling of the cage to escape from it. Raphael watched as a almost calm present fell over the two. The beast was sentient - should probably stop calling it by disembodied and ironic terms like monster - and it was answering him like a person. Like a friend who was just having a bad day and didn't want to talk but didn't want you to stop talking.

Raphael stepped closer to the bars, fixated on the mutant on cage floor that stared at him calmly, and blindly. He looked at the existence, the remembrance, the life, emotions, and everything that made a life a life...

He toke a breath, "Okay, let's continue..."

"Do you... Are you... Can..."

The beast turned his head in confusion.

"Can..."

The beast opened its mouth and was about to say something before it just let it go. Raphael about nearly fell down to a knee and fit his arm through the bars, to put any limb near the monster was against Donatello's warning and Raphael's better judgement, but he almost didn't care. He nearly asked a dumb question, but he was getting an idea...

He numbed up the mutant this far with memories, so maybe getting... answers was another way to get... around this situation.

"... Is Leonardo still in there? My big brother, is he alive?"

The beast launched up, wasn't snarling, but he was growling. The blue bandana swishing around as it clung on with only its single knot, the beast lashing at the gate once as settled down again.

"Raphael!" A voice behind him called.

He looked behind him and saw Donatello, Carter, and Master Splinter in the doorway of the lab. Donatello had the look of a mother who had caught someone swindling her brownies (or in others context, touching a killer mutant) and Carter was holding only what looked like a purchased college textbook (NERD!) but he looked afraid for a minute. Master Splinter was indifferent, but obviously very confused on many levels like why his son wasn't listening to his other sons warning!

Raphael barreled backwards as he saw the cage rattle and press as it was attacked again and again as the mutant toke on his rampage mode once again and dropped the calm act. Raphael looked up at those eyes. Dilated, hungry, fearful. Animalistic. Monstrous.

Not Leonardo.

He turned around when he felt a hand on his shoulder. He saw Master Splinter beside him and Donatello behind him. Master Splinter had the look of empathy, and Donatello looked at him with sadness from one brother to another.

"It's alright my student, Leonardo will be normal in no time at all with Donatello and Carter working night and day to get this new formula correct." Splinter said with genuine knowing.

"If, Master Splinter. "If" we can get it correct..." Donatello looks away as he mumbles his concerns.

"Do not fret Donatello, your cure is bound to come up at any time. One way or another." Splinter reassures Donatello now, guiding Donatello to Carter who stood at a console typing away science.

Raphael toke a look back. Leonardo was still fighting, still thinking he could escape from the genius that was Donatello's metal-steel plywood.

Animalistic.

Lost.

Monstrous.

Blood-thirty.

Crying and bellowing like something from Dimension X.

But worst of all to Raphael, it just wasn't...

... wasn't...

It wasn't Leonardo.

That was his final thought as Michelangelo made his sudden appearance and dragged him away. Probably because Donatello didn't trust him around Leonardo's cage anymore. Heck, he wouldn't either with what he was about to do. Michelangelo was talking to him at the dining table, asking him what is his problem. Why he disobeying orders from the Doc turtle himself? Was he alright, Leonardo had made him take a fast escape and fast escapes weren't always the cleanest. He was asked if he needed pizza. Pain killer? Aspirin? A nap? Soda? Water?

What was bugging him so bad?

And all Raphael could answer before picking up his glass of Cola as Michelangelo sat a pizza down for him.

It wasn't Leonardo.

And they sat in silence, Michelangelo putting his arm around Raphael's shell, shaking him for good measures.


End file.
